All I can do is recommend you another way to describe a situation where all outcomes are considered equally bad: Either choice is bad any way you slice it. Here's how the Macmillan Dictionary defines any way you slice it: used for saying that something remains true, whatever way you consider it. Example: The book is a bestseller any way you ... More @Wikipedia
Hover over any link to get a description of the article. Please note that search keywords are sometimes hidden within the full article and don't appear in the description or title.