They say that the only certainties in life are death and taxes—but what the hell do they know?! According to all of the available data, when it comes to the charmed life of Donald J. Trump, the normal rules don't apply. During the two glorious months since he launched his campaign to "Make America Great Again," the reports of Trump's death have been superlatively exaggerated. On numerous occasions, he's said some things that would've killed lesser candidates (losers); and each and every time, the pundits (haters) have begun writing his obituary—only to see him rise from the ashes. First came his incendiary remarks about Mexican rapists and drug dealers. While these comments might have hurt Trump's business interests/brand, he continues to feel the love of Latinos. Next, while talking about former POW John McCain, he expressed a preference for people who've never been captured—a sentiment that's apparently shared by a lot of Republican primary voters. And, most recently, he insinuated that Megyn Kelly's "tough questions" for him at the first GOP debate were the result of her menstrual cycle. But, as it turns out, teh womenz just can't get enough of stuff like that. Bottom line: With Trump driving the GOP clown car, the only certainty is that things are gonna get messy.