Earlier this year, I worked with a coaching client who was struggling with sex in her marriage. There was a tension between her and her husband each time he wanted to have sex. She rarely found herself in the mood to participate and had slipped into a pattern of obligatory and unenthusiastic sex with him. She wanted this to change, and in one of our sessions she confessed that, after having her first child, she didn’t know who she was as a sexual person.